The Magic Arcade Joke Page!
I told you never to pull a “porcupine” out of a hat!!!
(The Ever Merry One)
Denial : a river in Egypt
Defeat: de things at de end of de legs
Protractor: opposite of an amature tractor
De file :de thing to store documents/ smooth our finger nail
Debase: where de baseball players run to
Deport: where ships pull into
Deplane: what Herve Villachez saw
Demote: the water encircling a castle
Befriend: a bee you really like
Deduce: de card between the ace and the three
Deface:De thing on de front of your head
Default: what is usually yours, not hers
Dejay: what comes before de K
Decay: what comes before de L
Decide: not de top or bottom
Defer: de hair that keeps an animal warm
Defray: de shabby ends of de rope/ a fight
Deliver: de thing you fry with onions
Delight: something given off by de lamp
Denomination: what de politician got
Degrade: what de student got
Decent: also called de penny / de smell
Derrange: de stove in de kitchen
Deride de thing at de amusement park
Despair: dees shoes not does
Detour: where de guide takes you
Device: a clamp on de work bench
Deluge: a very fast one man sled course
Impure: a very clean imp-Agree: one gree
Debate: something to attract de fish
Activate: a vate with lots of energy
Allure: (see debate )
Align: the shortest distance between two points
Amaze: sweet corn for example
Astute: passing wind
Window: what you do when your poker hand is a royal flush
Cherub: polishing a chair
Coma: what Italians use to style their hair
Russia: what italians do when their in a hurry
Depose: what a photographer chooses
Depress; another term for journalists
Diffuse: de thing in de breaker box
Disjoin: to quit or leave a group
Gorgeous: what a bull will do
Debasement: aka, the cellar
Impact: an alliance formed by imps
Impart: creative works by imps i.e paintings ect.
Impatient: an imp in a hospital
Implants: floraand fauna owned by imps
Infantry: a baby tree
Bemoan:sound made by an injured bee
Apall: someone named Paul
Bassinet: a particular fish in a net
Briefcase: a container for your underwear
Candor: enterance to a bathroom
Carrion : small travel case allowed on board a plane
Counterfeits: what happens when a counter is properly measured
Despise: de people involved in espionage, Devote : what you cast in November
Is Houdini’s ghost called…
What’s a ghost that boxes called?
How do you describe a ghost that won’t quit?
What do near-sighted ghosts wear?
What do Hungary ghosts eat?
What does a ghost eat to cool off?
What do you get if you cross a ghost with a bag of potato chips?
Snacks that go munch in the night!
What happens when you don’t pay your exorcist’s bill?
You get repossessed!
Have you heard of the spooky fairytale?
Ghouldilocks and the three bears!
Where does an indian ghost live?
In a creepy teepee!
What must a ghost apply for?
A haunting permit!
Why didn’t the bartender give the ghosts a drink?
Because he refused to serve spirits!
What is the difference between a magician and the letters K. E. M. A. S.?
One makes spells and the other spells makes!
What does a teacher have that the class doesn’t?
What’s black and white and hard to figure?
A math test!
English teacher: “What’s the longest sentance possible?”
Student: “Life Imprisonment!”
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because the class was so bright!
Billy’s Mom: “How did you like your first day of school?”
Billy: “You mean I have to go back there again?”
Why did the teacher marry the custodian?
Because he swept her off her feet!
Bobby: “Were the questions on the test hard?”
Billy: “No, but I had a lot of problems with the answers!”
Why is a classroom like a old automobile?
Because it’s full of nuts and it has a crank up in front!
What were the Wright brothers called before they invented the airplane?
The wrong brothers!
History teacher: “Who knows what the cold war was?”
Student: “A snowball fight!”
When are school uniforms risky?
When they have a blazer!
Joey: “Hey dad! I think my teacher likes me a lot!
She keeps putting lots of kisses next to my answers!”
Why did the Rocket lose it’s job?
It was “Fired!”
What is black & white with a cherry on top?
A police car!
What did the magician in the middle-east name his rabbit ?
Answer: Hassan Feffer !
Ahhh! So that’s how they do it!
No wonder why cards are so smooth!